Scan 26

It’s TBT so here’s Zackary at about 8 years old. It’s one of my favorite pictures of him. Just pure luck we were able to capture this because I am really not a good photographer.

Yesterday was such a tough day. I was feeling very shack happy so we decided to go to a movie, American Sniper. Two hours and twelve minutes long not including the previews. It really wasn’t Zack’s taste in movies so to bribe him I told him I’d get him an iTunes card after we were done. He’s a total gamer.

He did great in the movie with just one bathroom break (yeah!). We got the card and he immediately went upstairs to play video games. A short while later I hear a noise that sounds like breaking wood. I run upstairs to find that he had removed the trim from around the outside his bedroom door because it had a crack in it, broke into pieces and threw it away. (Very obviously it had been garbage just sitting there waiting to be demo’d.)

Heavy sigh.

When he was younger we spent so much time and money trying to cure him in the hope that he could be just like all the others kids. ABA, verbal behavior, RDI, tutoring, speech therapy, OT and PT even (for a broken leg). Beanie babies and play at McDonalds every Friday, all manner of lessons to see if his interests would increase, elaborate birthday parties, social skills groups that we would run out of our house were just normal everyday life for us. Trips to Disney with social stories and written schedules that were planned out to the minute and followed oh so precisely. Ike did less planning to invade Normandy. We chased normal hard and I feel exhausted just writing about it.

I think that at the time I had very unrealistic expectations. But if there was one thing I could go back in time and change I can’t think of it. I’m glad that I don’t have to look back with regret wondering if we could have or should have done more. Time lost is a precious commodity that can never be bought back. Use your now wisely.

In peace.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s